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A friend is "one attached to   another by affection or esteem"

---Marriam-Webster Dictionary (Marriam-Webster, 2011)

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 * Interpersonal Communication: What Is It and How Have Friendships Been Affected By the Digital Age? **

===Interpersonal Communication is, “Communication that occurs between two people within the context of their relationship and that, as it evolves, helps them to negotiate and define their relationship” (Floyd, 2009, p. 24). === ===Friends use interpersonal communication to interact with each other, express feelings, and maintain their relationship. Roy Baumeister’s need to belong theory was formed to explain our innate “…drive to seek, form, maintain, and protect strong social relationships” (Floyd, 2009, p. 293). This drive is fulfilled when we form “…social bonds that are both interactive and emotionally close,” like those characteristic of a good friendship (Floyd, 2009, p.293). === ===Over the last century, developments in communications technology from the Digital Age have evolved the ways in which we communicate with our friends. We will explore further into the transformation of interpersonal communication between friends over time from face-to-face contact, letters, telecommunication, and email all the way to social networking sites. ===

=**Face to Face**= In face to face communication, we have all the cues available to us: words, facial expression, gestures, body language, tone of voice, and other people in the room that might be present. If there is something missing in the person's words, there are other cues that will complement the message, if they are congruent with the words. The message will be more complete and clear when all cues are present. This graph shows face to face communication is conveyed: With online communication you cannot see a person's body language or know if they are angry, sad, or happy unless it is expressed with their words. This can be the downfall of face to face communication because the graph above shows that we only listen to 10% of what is being said, so there is a benefit to writing our feelings down. As for communicating with friends online like on Facebook, people may feel connected with their friends who post frequent status updates but they are most likely missing out on the most important information. Even most social over-sharers will not post when they experience a rejection. Until they can get face to face with them and ask them how they are really doing, it is unlikely that they will be able to fully relate to their friends. Interactions online tend to be brief and to the point. Friendship is more than just keeping tabs on one’s daily life, it is about supporting and encouraging each other’s dreams, hopes, and wishes. Finding time to nurture our relationships with our children, our siblings, our friends, our parents, and our significant others will enrich our lives. Spending time with people we truly care for that support and honor us will increase our energy levels. So using face to face communication, which has been around since the dawn of time, will always be the most important way of communicating, especially with our loved ones.

=**Letters**=
 * Writing letters has been around for long time until emails came about, now it seems that no one writes letters as much. People back in the day had to walk to deliver letters and now people can just send a message right from their computer. Of course, people still receive letters from colleges and universities and bills and advertisements but no one really sends out letters or postcards to friends that much anymore. Letters seem to be less important than they were many years ago. Here are some advantages and disadvantages of letters: **

** Advantages :**

 * ** Usually much more personal than electronic communication **
 * ** Shows your commitment through energy and time **
 * ** Do not need a computer or the internet **
 * ** Well established process that is easy to use and follow **
 * ** Materials (stamps, envelopes) are cheap **

** Disadvantages :**

 * ** Hard to edit mistakes **
 * ** Takes too much time to hand write a letter **
 * ** Must deliver to a mailbox or post office **
 * ** Requires a stamp and envelopes **
 * ** Letters can get lost ‘in the mail’ **
 * ** Addresses can be lost if people move **

=**Home Phone**= **Phones have revolutionized the way we communicate with each other. The need to write a letter to communicate with ones friends has been drastically reduced. One could simply pick up the phone and call someone else and have a one on one instant conversation without the need to wait. Vocal non-verbal communication is also present with a phone call. You could tell what mood someone is in by listening to their voice. Friendships were strengthened by this device, because the distance didn't matter if you wanted to talk to someone on the phone. Some disadvantages this has is that it doesn't have the other non-verbal communication that isn't correlated with sound, one phone could contact more then one person, and it's very much stationary.**

=**Television**= ===Television can be a form of noise, or distraction, that hinders communication (Floyd, 2009, p. 271). It can also hinder by consuming time that could have been spent with friends. At the University of Maryland (2008), a study by sociologists found that unhappy people spent 20% more time watching television than self-reported socially active happy people. ===

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However, what someone watches on television can become a topic of conversation with a friend.


=**Cell Phones**= **Cell phones have taken the idea of normal home phones, and made it a more personal, portable experience. With these types of phones, you have your own phone number, and that device can go anywhere with you, so your not tied to a wire like you would be in your home phone. And with the introduction and popularization of the smart phone, not only can you keep in touch with your friends at nearly all times, but you have the entirety of the internet at your fingertips. One of the negative effects to this is the temptation of remaining on your phone when your with someone, sometimes we get too engrossed with remaining connected, that we disconnect from our surroundings.**



=**Texting**= **With the popularization of cell phones came a new form of sending information between friends. Short Messaging Service (SMS), also knows as texting, are little bursts of information that one person can send to one or multiple receivers on a cell phone. Friends use this all the time to arrange get togethers, ask a simple question, or even have conversations with each other when voice communication is not possible. Like the cell phones, the problem is that we are so focused on sending each other text messages, that we forget to pay attention to what we are focused on. They also lack the voice non-verbal communication that comes with talking on any sort of phone or face to face.**



=**E-mail**= **The attraction theory describes why we are drawn to others.** One of the important predictors of attraction is proximity, which refers to how close together people live or work and how often they interact. We are more likely to form friendships with people who we see often and interact with. However, some researchers have suggested that online resources, such as email, have reduced the influence of physical proximity. (Floyd, 2009, p. 299) By sending a friend an email we can make an instant connection. We can update them on what is going on in our lives in seconds and receive a response in equal time. Sometimes, when we are in need of getting something off our chest, it is nice to sit down and write it out. Being able to send our thoughts to a friend for advice or support can often make things seem not as significant.


 * "Communication scholar and friendship expert William Rawlins has proposed that most friendships move through a life span consisting of six stages." (Floyd, 2009, p.316)**

1. Role Limited Reaction- Two people meet, they are civil and polite but share little personal information. 2. Friendly Relations- After talking for awhile, the conversation is friendlier. 3. Moves Toward Friendship- They spend time together and are less bound by rules and norms. 4. Nascent Friendship- They consider themselves friends, they are more personal and less prescribed. 5. Stablized Friendship- They have fully established a friendship, they trust each other strongly and adjust their attitudes and opinions to become more inline with each other. 6. Waning Friendship- After many years, their friendship declines, become distant, casual or even end.
 * Ending a friendship is never easy and there are many lines of communication to do so. Sending an email to a friend with whom you have shared some good and bad times with over a lengthy period of time, is impersonal and should not be a first choice but sometimes it is may be necessary**.

[|Ending a friendship via email] = =

=**Social Media**= According to communication researchers Stafford and Canary, one of the five primary behaviors people use to maintain their social relationships include their Social Networks, introducing one person to your other friends, family members, and co-workers. Facebook does this by connecting any two people on your profile. It's a great way to find friends from highschool or childhood. Sometimes you find that you have friends in common, thus, converging your social networks. (Floyd, 2009, p. 309)

= [|How To Find Friends On Skype] =

Once we have established a friendship, it is sometimes hard to maintain depending on proximity or just having the time to meet up and discuss what is going on in our lives. Of course you can have a conversation on the phone, but you can not fully understand a person's emotional state by hearing their voice alone. "The two most expressive channels for emotion are facial expressions and vocal behaviors." (Floyd, 2009, p. 237) By using Skype, we have the opportuntiy to see and hear our friends as if we were sitting accross a table from each other.



Having friends provides us with at least two emotional rewards, emotional support and happiness. In times of turmoil, emotional support can provide us with comfort and empathy. Our friends also bring us happiness. We enjoy being around them because they are entertaining and most of our best times are spent with our friends. (Floyd, 2009, p. 294)

== = = ===**Telecommunication, social networking sites, and email have affected communication in friendships significantly from previous traditional norms. These affects can vary from relationship to relationship and range from positive to negative. Advances in communications technology from the Digital Age can be used as a valuable tool to maintain positive and consistent interaction between friends, especially when physical face-to-face time is not possible.** ===

=**References**=

Ending a friendship via email. Retrieved from [] Facebook Image. Retrieved from [] Floyd, Kory (2009). Interpersonal Communication: The Whole Story. New York, NY: The McGraw-Hill Companies How to find friends on Skype. Retrieved from [] Merriam-Webster Dictionary (2011) Friends.[] Skype Images. Retrieved from [] University of Maryland study, "Unhappy People Watch TV, Happy People Read/Socialize". [] [] Boy watching T.V. image [] Girls watching T.V. image [] Girlfriends taking pics of themselves [] A site selling red rotary phones [] An article about the iPhone Someone using their phone to text [] Woman on Skype

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